Moobaloo Eats a Hamburger

One day there was a mermain who lived in the ocean. Now, mermaids are a lot like people, except they have a great big fish tail instead of legs.

Most mermaids eat fish, but Moobaloo was alergic to fish. She couldn't eat it. So she had to live on seaweed.

She said to her friend, the little fish (whose name was Horace), "I am SO sick of eating seaweed. And I can't eat fish. I wish I could eat something new."

And Horace said, "Well, I have a story for you. One day a fisherman caught me on his line. He measured me, and because I was too small he threw me back into the ocean. But while he was measuring me I saw people eating hamburgers in a little bungalow. Hamburgers are made of beef, not fish, so I bet you could eat one."

Moobaloo was very interested in this. "I am going to eat a hamburger." she said.

"But the shore is very far away!" said the little fish Horace.

"It does not matter." said Moobaloo.

So she set out. She swam for a day, and then for another day. When she finally got to the shore it was night time. She pulled herself out onto the sand, wiggling across the beach because she had a tail and no legs.

Just then, clouds moved out from in front of the moon. It was a full moon that night, and when the moonlight touched Moobaloo's tail, PLOOF, it turned into two legs! She stood up, and shee could see the little bungalow where the hamburgers were being made.

But as she looked she realized that all the people in the bungalow were wearing clothes. But mermaids don't wear clothes. Moobaloo was totally naked. So she looked around on the beach and she found a towel that somebody had left at the beach. Maybe it was your family that forgot the towel.

She wrapped the towel around her chest so that she covered up he girl parts, and into the bungalow she went.

She said, "I would like ahamburger please!"

The man at the counter said, "Would you like it rare, medium, or well done?"

Moobaloo said, "What do you mean?"

The man, whose name was Mike, said, "What do you mean what do I mean? Haven't you ever had a hamburger before?"

"Nope," said Moobaloo, "This is my first one."

"Holy Moley!" said Mike, "That is hard for me to imagine! Well, rare is when we only cook the hamburger a little bit. Medium is when we cook it more, and well done is when we cook it so much that there isn't any pink left inside it."

Moobaloo thought about this. All of the mermaids she knew ate their fish raw. "I would like it rare, please." she said.

So Mike cooker her a hamburger, and he gave the french fries and ketchup. Moobaloo sat down and ate everything. She thought it was so good!

Then Mike came over and said, "OK. That will be eight dollars please."

"What is a dollar?" asked Moobaloo.

"You don't know what a dollar is?" Mike asked.

"No, I've never used one before." said Moobaloo.

Then Mike got a look on his face that made Moobaloo worried. She ran out of the bungalow towards the ocean. Mike came out after her, chasing. As Moobaloo got near the ocean a cloud went in front of the moon. Moobaloo's legs turned back into a tail, and she had to drag herself across the sand. Of course Mike caught up to her.

He said, "Holey Moley! You are a mermaid! No wonder you didn't know what money was. You don't have to pay for your hamburger. I will take it out of my pay for you."

"Thank you." said Moobaloo.

Mike picked Moobaloo up and carried he the rest of the way to the ocean. He waded in all the way up to his chest. As Moobaloo swam away she popped up above the surface and waved back to Mike. "Thank you!" she said.

"I will never forget this!" said Mike.

Then Moobaloo swam away, and that was the only hamburger she ever ate.

The End
(c) 2007 Ken Demarest